it's not god that hates us, it's jeff and britta. (endofhistory) wrote in leviosameta,
it's not god that hates us, it's jeff and britta.
endofhistory
leviosameta



thus it is so: Although I imagined Emmeline and Sirius hiding under the covers with flaslights from Lillestan.
thus it is so: I HAD WAY TOO MUCH FREE TIME.
thus it is so: AT WORK
thus it is so: FOR MY MIND.
ifoundmycard: HAHAHA.
ifoundmycard: SO FUNNY.
thus it is so: "...did you hear that?"
ifoundmycard: "Let's tell ghost stories!"
thus it is so: "One time there was this boy and this girl and they went and knocked on the door of two suspected serial killers!"
ifoundmycard: HAHAHAHA.
ifoundmycard: "...wait. I've heard this one before. Where have I heard this one before?"
thus it is so: "BECAUSE WE DID THAT TODAY!"
ifoundmycard: "OH POINT. And then this house elf came to the door."
thus it is so: "And they chopped it's head off. And then they were nearly killed by a screaming baby."
ifoundmycard: "WHAT THE FUCK WAS UP WITH THAT BABY?"
thus it is so: "THAT BABY WAS THE UGLIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. WHY DID IT HAVE TO SCREAM SO LOUD?"
ifoundmycard: "...It was the baby of two serial killers. It was miserable. Obviously it wanted us to save it."
thus it is so: "Obviously. But too bad we hate children. So then the UGLIEST CREATURE ALIVE and her husband came out and the girl's Obliviate picked a SUPER FUCKING AWFUL time not to work."
ifoundmycard: "And then the girl SCREAMED when the husband put the devilishly handsome hot young teenaged male under the Imperius curse and demanded his baby back."
thus it is so: "...I don't remember anyone devilishly handsome hot young teenager there. I would have noticed."
ifoundmycard: "HE WAS THERE! He was the one holding the devilspawn!"
thus it is so: "Ohhhh...well, he was okay. And then the teenagers had a VERBAL DUEL with the killers. And the devilspawn."
ifoundmycard: "He was DEVILISHLY HANDSOME. And the devilishly handsome TOTALLY FIT teenager RESISTED IMPERIUS and the evil motherfucker stole his devilspawn back, so the curse was removed and the devilishly fit and handsome teenager USED OBLIVIATION on the husband. Because he'd beheaded the house elf earlier in the story."
thus it is so: "And the OTHER TEENAGER who is not EMBELISHING FACTS ABOUT HERSELF tried to Obliviate the UGLIEST CREATURE ALIVE which was holding the DEVILSPAWN because the TEENAGER WHO MAKES STUFF UP beheaded their houseelf earlier in the story."
ifoundmycard: "BUT THE TEENAGER WHO WAS DEVILISHLY HANDSOME AND IS STILL HOT-- and, he might add, under the covers with the relatively decent teenager who isn't embellishing details about herself-- WAS JUST USING AN OLD PUREBLOOD HEX AGAINST THEIR HOUSELF, OH THE IRONY, so it was worth going to the trouble of having to Obliviate both of them."
thus it is so: "And then the TWO TEENAGERS ran away LIKE HELL and flew FAR, FAR AWAY. And planned on never going back without at least TEN AURORS."
ifoundmycard: "Good idea. Ten?"
thus it is so: "Yes. Ten." Pause. "...Sirius?"
ifoundmycard: "...yeah?"
thus it is so: "I think I'm more afraid of Moody than I am of them."
ifoundmycard: "Me too."
thus it is so: "Do we have to go?"
ifoundmycard: "He'll hunt us down and kill you. He'll spare me because I'm devilishly handsome and my charm is irresistible."
thus it is so: "HA. I think he'd kill you first. You're more annoying."
ifoundmycard: "I'm not!"
thus it is so: "Are too!"
ifoundmycard: "At least I don't work at an art shop."
thus it is so: "HEY. AT LEAST I WORK!"
ifoundmycard: "Nothing wrong with being a filthy rich devilishly handsome bachelor!"
thus it is so: "Except that your an arse."

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